Conscious Creating

I pray that this very moment finds you with a wide smile on your face and a light heart. So, I’m half way through my Life Coach training course and can I say that I am NOT used to doing homework! My daughter and I spend hours a week together trying to figure it out :-)

Reading and self-exploration is a huge part of my training and I've experienced brief moments of anxiety due to discovering personal roadblocks that I didn’t know I had and delving deeper into the ones that I’ve been diligently working on for some time now. Luckily I've been able to stay on track by surrounding myself with positive affirmations and by changing my environment (a brisk walk outside does wonders for the soul!). As a part of the training there are a few books on the required reading list. All of the books share a common theme - the power of the subconscious mind. Our conscious mind is considered our rational or logical mind. It plants the seeds of intention within our subconscious mind, which in turn manifests our thoughts into our reality. Our subconscious mind controls our emotions, houses our belief systems and memories. In order for us to overcome negative patterns in our lives and to consciously create a glorious life beyond our wildest dreams we have to be aware of the role and power of our subconscious mind.

From the readings I realized that my past issues were definitely linked to my subconscious mind. In the the past I believed that I would always struggle in some way financially. My parents were comfortable but there was always something that kept them in a state of "just getting by." If I did manage to get ahead financially something would always come up and I would be back to square one. From unexpected bills to forgotten debts I always found myself operating in the red. Years agao I was introduced to the Law of Attraction and at the time I thought it was the answer to my prayers.

I went to work on shifting my paradigm and seeing myself as living financially free. In the beginning things were wonderful and I was growing financially by leaps and bounds. But in time I found that things went back to the way they were, borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and vice versa. Confused and a little disillusioned, I spoke with a mentor about what was happening. She advised that I had never truly addressed my belief system when it came to money. Despite my affirmations and new attitude the more I focused on manifesting money the more I became crippled with old fears of not having enough.

Have you ever accomplished something in your life that you thought impossible or too challenging? And then shortly after crossing a major hurdle or achieving success things started to regress? Or have you started seeing the success from your efforts and something came along to pause or completely stop your progress? Memories and beliefs stored in our subconscious mind has the ability to delay or even undo wonderful things that we are manifesting.

So do we spend a lifetime dismantling all of the negative belief systems that we have built up? The answer is no! My mentor taught me that instead of focusing on dis-creating old belief systems we can all consciously create new belief systems that will negate the old ones. So instead of focusing on manifesting just financial wealth (in my case I focused on specific dollar amounts) we can instead set the intention to live life happy and carefree, which encompasses everything from financial freedom to perfect health.

Are you consciously creating the life you desire? If not, take a few moments and write down the life that you want to create as if you are living it right now. Be very broad and open, as this will allow room for things you never imagined. If it’s a relationship that you desire be thankful for all the love in your life. Are you in need of a career overhaul? Be thankful for your success and watch as opportunities for success arrive.

Be sure to have FUN as you create the life you've always imagined! And may your days be filled with love, light and miracles.

Greater Expectations

Several months ago one of my students (who is also a dear friend) gave me a book entitled Be Your Own Life Coach written by Fiona Harold, a highly successful British Life Coach. He said he'd had the book for awhile and thought that I may find it useful. Though touched by the gesture I had no real interest in Life Coaching as I was evolving beautifully with yoga and meditation.

Weeks passed and "mysteriously" I began to get emails about life coaching courses. Knowing that I was receiving not so subtle nudges from the Universe I decided to open myself energetically to the possibility. When my friends started to email and call me about looking into life coaching because of something they heard on the radio or television I finally decided to pursue this divinely inspired career path. The process so far has been both refreshing and eye opening. Through self-exploratory exercises I soon realized that I still have some disempowering beliefs that need to be addressed and disarmed.

In the book Fiona states that “our expectations of people shape the way we treat them and the way they respond.” She explains that we all have expectations that we carry around with us all the time. From morning traffic to the demeanor of an overstressed agent at the MVA counter, we expect people to act in a certain manner and situations to end in a particular way. Due to the power of our thoughs we are rarely disappointed. This made me think of a time not too long ago when I was in the 15 items or less express lane at the grocery store. I didn’t pay attention to the sign and got in line because it was short. As I got closer to the checkout I realized that I had grossly exceeded the 15 item maximum and just knew that the cashier would have a problem with me ignoring the rules. I told myself that she has to deal with this everyday and is more than likely tired of people disregarding the posted sign.

Sure enough as I placed my items on the belt she curtly advised me that I should have been in another line and unhappily scanned my items. This caused my energy to shift and I immediately went into defense mode. I had made an honest mistake, why was she judging me? And I'm sure I wasn't the only one who made this mistake before, it's not like I did it on purpose! From the beginning I told myself that she would have major attitude, so it was no big surprise.

Has this ever happened to you? Have you played out a scenario in your mind just expecting the worse possible outcome to happen and then it did? We all have positive and not so positive expectations that drive our lives. From knowing that you are going to have a wonderful day to expecting the boss to suggest an unrealistic deadline for a project, we call these things into existence through our expectations and thoughts.

Fiona suggests a five-step fail proof plan to shift your expectancies from negative to positive:

1. Be Vigilant. It will take time to identify which expectancies need to shift. It is very important that we pay close attention to our mental chatter. If a negative belief comes up immediately change it to the positive. So instead of “the checkout person is going to give me major attitude” think “the checkout person is very understanding and enjoys helping out people like me.”

2. Guard Your Conclusions. We form our expectations every day based on what going on in our life and around us. It is very important that as we are taking on new expectations they are positive, and not limiting or negative.

3. Stay Cheerful. When life throws us lemons, let’s make yummy lemonade! It is very hard for negative beliefs to invade our space if we are happy and joyful. Though challenging at times we can all look for the silver lining and at the very least shift our energy with a smile or a laugh (which can be VERY contagious!)

4. Be Grateful. Most of us have heard it time and time again ¬ “stay in an attitude of gratitude”. Instead of focusing on the things that can/should be different or better be happy for the things in your life that are wonderful and blessed.

5. Choose Optimistic Friends. I’m sure we’ve all had friends at one time or another that are a little less than positive. Maintaining a positive attitude is hard enough but can be made more difficult if the people in your inner circle don’t share these beliefs. Think of the old saying “misery loves company.” If that is true then happiness and joy loves company too! So surround yourself with friends who choose positivity over negativity and support one another.

We know that this life is ours for the taking and it is based on what we expect from it. So knowing this why not expect prosperity, unconditional love, joy, happiness and anything else your heart desires?

It is your right and within your reach so grab it and hold on tight!

The Opinion Trap

Recently I was watching a show about a cooking competition on TV and one of the contestants was hugely criticized by one of the judges on the dish he prepared. Unfazed by the harsh words he shrugged it off and said that it was all a matter of opinion and he felt he did a good job and that's all that mattered. The other contestants looked at him in disbelief and voiced that he should accept the constructive criticism and make the appropriate changes. He reaffirmed his belief in what he presented and advised that if given another opportunity he wouldn’t change a thing.

His statement reminded me of one of my favorite quotes by an unknown author that states "your opinion of me is none of my business." When I first heard the quote I thought, “now what the heck does that mean????.” How could we discount opinions? They are important for our growth, right? As a child I was taught to uphold certain standards and keep in mind how others will react or what they would say. Growing up I had a very "interesting" sense of style and my mother would lovingly tell me that everyone may not get it. Not wanting people to judge me or tell me that I looked silly I would change. As I grew older I found myself trying to stay with whatever was in Vogue¬ despite my secret desire to mix polka dots and plaid!

When I began my healing journey years ago I realized that I was living my life based on what others would think of me or say about me. Instead of bracing myself for constructive criticism I would try to avoid it altogether and be what I thought others expected me to be. I found that this caused me a great deal of mental stress. I vowed to let go and live my life as I wanted to, regardless of what someone may think or say.

Are you stuck in a hold pattern or afraid to express who you really are because others may not understand or get it? Does the thought of constructive criticism make you cringe and unwilling to do the things you want to do? Sometimes we look for validation outside of ourselves when actually the only opinion that counts is our own. This life is yours to live, however you want. There will always be opinions; YOU decide which ones count and which ones don't.

So put on our polka dots and plaid and live life freely!

The Power of Positive Affirmations

This summer-like spring weather has me excited about going to the beach this year. I always try to do a little more physical activity in preparation for my “beach attire.” Since I already do yoga and dance almost every day I decided to add something more aerobic to my repertoire. Since I already spend enough time away from the family I decided to do something in-house. My daughter got a Wii Fit for her birthday so I decided to use it as a way to workout.

When the program started there was an option to do a body assessment. At first I thought there was no need to because I am already in decent shape. But curiosity got the best of me and I decided to go on and do it. To my surprise (more like horror) not only was my BMI (body mass index) borderline overweight but also my "real" age was eleven years older than my actual age. My little “Mii” went from looking fit to having a bulging belly and a hunched spine (which reminds me, I need to contact Nintendo about being a little more sensitive). I reset the game and tried it again and the results were only slightly better. That sinking feeling set in and my mood went down south.

There had to be something going on, it had to be some sort of mistake. I eat well, drink more than the suggested amount of water and I am a yoga and dance teacher for goodness sake! Not one to stay in a bad mood I started to meditate and do more yoga to shift my energy. Though my meditation and yoga practice helped me feel better my mood did not fully improve. I thought back to the days in high school when I was a size 3 and could eat whatever I wanted without worrying it would stick to my hips. At this stage in my life I am healthier than I had ever been in and I was allowing this silly little game get me down.

I needed to do more to get out of my funk. During my meditation I pushed the negative thoughts away but in essence they were still there lingering in the background. I decided to face these thoughts and flip it. I listened to my inner chatter and wrote down positive affirmations to counter self-defeating thoughts. Positive affirmations are powerful statements that transform negative energy by changing our internal dialogue. So instead of “I feel fat” I wrote down “I am fit”. Another powerful affirmation that helped quite a bit is “I am the perfect size, the perfect weight and in perfect health.” It put everything into perspective and addressed exactly what I was feeling.

I recited my affirmations several times a day for the next few days and had a few written on sticky notes around the house. Slowly but surely my mood was lifted. I don’t want to be a size 3 again, I am happy at the size that I am and I truly feel WONDERFUL! My body isn’t stricken with constant colds anymore and my asthma is a thing of the past. The affirmations not only lifted my mood but they reminded me that I have a lot to be grateful for.

The beauty of positive affirmations is that we can immediately shift negative energy by changing our inner dialogue. If you are stuck in a rut or need positive reinforcement, here are five simple steps for creating your own unique positive affirmations:

1. Make a short list of things that are contributing to negative thoughts/feelings.

2. Write the list again in a positive sense. For example "I am overweight" becomes "I am healthy, happy and the perfect weight." Be sure to begin each with "I" and write it in the present tense as if it were already accomplished. Statements should be short and concise.

3. Believe in your affirmations! Don’t write anything that would cause you to say “yeah right!”, they have to be true to you.

4. Put your affirmations where you can see them daily. They are best put in places that you frequent such as the kitchen or bathroom.

5. Repeat your affirmations (with conviction!) several times a day.


Negative thoughts and bad moods happen - we all have our moments; it is part of the human experience. Despite it all know and believe that we can create a life that we love.

Remembering resolutions

Oh my how time does fly, taxes are due, April showers are making way for May flowers and New Year's resolutions are probably quickly becoming a fleeting thought :-) My resolution of letting go of my superwoman complex and having more downtime has been a tough one to stick to. The state of the economy and other world events have more and more people seeking ways to reduce stress and live a more balanced life. Organizations have started hosting more health fairs and stress management workshops to help employees cope with the economy woes. As a native New Yorker and a recovering “A” type personality I lived through years of self-induced stress and was very sensitive to what was going on in the world. Through yoga and meditation I was able to relax, reconnect to joy and look at life from a more positive perspective. Because of this I welcome each and every opportunity to share the wonderful benefits to all that will listen.

After one particularly hectic weekend I almost gave up on my sole resolution. My calendar was jammed packed with activities for the next several days and no break was in sight. Even in the midst of the recession I am blessed to have a steady flow of work. It would be crazy for me to turn down an appointment or class opportunity, right? Old anxieties snuck up on me so I took some time to meditate to gain clarity.

After several minutes I decided to stay on task and created a rule of three "R's" for when I needed guidance and/or motivation. If you are at an impasse with your resolution(s) try my three “R’s” rule:

1. Revisit. Ask yourself, "is this resolution still relevant to where I want/need to be in my life at this time?" If the answer is no let go and find peace with your decision.
   


2. Revamp. If this resolution is necessary for you to live a happy and balanced life and old methods aren't working, revamp your plan of action. Explore ways to achieve your goal(s) by utilizing different methods.
   


3. Reconnect. We are capable creating the life that we desire. In order to do this we must reconnect with our source energy - happiness. Find joy and happiness is all that you do ¬this will keep us all motivated and energized.
   
   May you continue to be surrounded by love, joy and happiness.
   

Creating Karma

A few weeks ago I did something that I haven't done in a very long time - I watched the news. I decided a long time ago that I would only watch the news long enough to check on the weather or traffic. If I watched any longer I would often feel drained, angry, paranoid or just plain fed up. A story about a fatal attack on a mother and her teenage daughter in their home caught my attention. They lived very close to me and apparently this was the second case involving a vicious attack on a mother and her daughter in the area. The story left me in tears and angry that someone could so callously take precious lives. Then paranoia crept, I have a daughter and sometimes we are home alone. I ran around the house, checked all the locks, turned the alarm system on and grabbed tightly held my confused daughter.

The story stayed on the news and I made it a point to tune in every day that week. I prayed that those responsible were caught and brought to justice. I watched the news every single day, sometimes twice a day. Each day that I watched I felt a little more saddened and frustrated that justice hadn't been delivered.

At the end of the week I finally turned the television off and emotionally disconnected. This was a horribly tragic event and I was sad that it happened…. but there was nothing I could do about it and seeing justice done would not change the fact that precious lives were lost. It is not my job to be judge and jury. Instead of harping on the sadness I instead sent love and light to the families.

In life, we are constantly creating our own karma. Some of us may feel that karma is about judgment or an eye for an eye, but it isn’t. Karma is simply the universal law of cause and effect. Every action, every word, every thought carries energy out into the universe and shapes our present and future experiences.

Wayne Dyer says “how people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” So the next time someone steals your parking space, cuts you in line without permission or makes a rude comment just smile knowing that it’s not about you. Continue to create good karma in your life by detaching from the need to see justice done or to deliver payback.

Today and each and every day: live your life fully, honestly and with respect for yourself, others and nature.

Spring cleaning

Spring is finally here and as always, I look forward to my annual cleaning rituals. The house will be cleaned from top to bottom (much to my family’s delight), papers will be shredded and recycled, and items that are no longer needed will be donated to worthy causes. Though the house is well maintained for the most part, a good hands and knees scrubbing with a toothbrush is necessary at least once a year *s*.

My house isn’t the only thing that gets cleaned during the change of season. Each year I cleanse my body temple also. I normally spend at least a week fasting and cleansing, doing longer meditations and daily positive affirmations.

I use my meditations and positive affirmations as a way to clear out mental clutter. My mental clutter consists of a string of random thoughts such as “how did I let things get out of hand” or “I should have taken the time to do more.” I allow these thoughts to come to the surface and through love I acknowledge and release them and heal each one as they come up. Instead of beating myself up I am instead motivated knowing tomorrow is another day and a second chance to get back on track.

The road to total health and wellness is oftentimes a challenging one. In a “perfect” world we would all be consistent and there would be no unexpected challenges on our journey. The reality is that we all have the best intentions, but due to the wonderful unpredictability of our day to day lives we may get off track a little (or a lot!). This time of year gives us all the opportunity for a fresh start or at the very least a reminder to pick up where we left off.

As spring blossoms take the time to cleanse your body temple – starting upstairs, waaaay up in the attic. Brush away the cobwebs of self-doubt, wipe away thoughts of unworthiness. Open the windows so that the shadow of fear and frustration disappears in the bright light of hope and love.

As always, wellbeing starts in the mind – so what’s on yours?

The fear of failure

Recently during my daily ritual of sorting through SPAM emails I came across one that was junk mail but I decided to read it anyway. It began with a quote by Canadian actress Mary Pickford: "you have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down." It made me remember a conversation I had with my doctor several months ago. During the conversation he asked me if I had any fears or phobias. Immediately I shared with him my phobia of clowns (I'm working on not having to hide behind my husband at circuses!) and my fear that something will happen to a loved one. He told me to dig a little deeper and asked if there was anything else.

After a few moments I admitted that I am proactively working on my fear of failure. In the past, my fear of failure held me back from taking on new projects and exploring my budding creative talents. I felt if I didn't try then there was no way I could fail and nothing would be lost. But in time my fear of failure actually felt as if I was failing myself. I wasn't living an open and free life because I was scared of what was out there and not measuring up to expectations (namely my own). Several years ago someone shared the true meaning of fear with me. F.E.A.R. is "False Evidence Appearing Real." We tend to put ourselves through a lot emotionally and mentally, which can cause us to see things in a distorted way.

The truth about failure is that it doesn't have to exist. Things may not work out in the way that you intended but there is always another day to get closer to your goal. Tomorrow always presents the opportunity to do it better if needed or at the very least do it the same way again!

Living on purpose

I woke up early this morning to do some quiet meditation before my family started putting in their requests for the day. Last week was hectic and I needed to clear the mental clutter before beginning another week. After my meditation I looked at my bookshelf and remembered there are a few books on my "to read" list that I haven't gotten to yet. I was instantly drawn to The Rhythm of Life: Living Every Day with Passion and Purpose by Matthew Kelly. A dear friend had given me the book a while ago and I did read it but for some reason couldn't remember the concept, other than what the title suggested.

Always knowing that I am drawn to things for a reason I closed my eyes and opened the book to a "random" page. I landed on page 139 entitled Why are we all so busy? Smiling, I was once again reminded of my resolution to slow down, which I am still working on with an open heart and no self-judgment. The chapter discusses the author's life and what led him to write the book. Like many of us he reflected on the concepts of life and death, God and religion, society and other emotions the average human experiences. He wondered if he was put on earth for any real purpose. I've often reflected on about our ability to make choices and how we have the power to do anything our hearts desire, but what we may forget or not consider is that we are all here for a purpose that was decided a long time ago.

Many of us know and feel what our purpose is but for whatever reason choose to take our lives in a different and sometimes unfulfilling direction. So how do we start (or get back to) living on purpose? Matthew Kelly states that "our lives change when we stop merely replying to questions and begin to ask them." If you need to know your purpose just simply ask and be open to seeing and accepting the answer you receive.

We are in the midst of a Universal shift in consciousness and change. Now is the time for us to truly live our destinies and share our light with the world.

May your existence be filled love, laughter, happiness and purposeful living.

Let yourself be open and free

This has been a wonderfully exciting, emotional and historic week. My daughter turned 7 years old on Tuesday and I was able to witness history (from the comfort of my home of course!). Grateful for the downtime, I decided to treat myself to a massage and acupuncture to relax. At first it was strange being the one on the table, as it is I who normally gives the treatments. It took a while for me to relax as I found myself taking in everything and wondering "what's going to happen next?" I found myself trying to figure out what energy line was being worked on and if there was anything I could incorporate into my practice.

As I stared at the ceiling and took in my peaceful surroundings a conversation with one of my massage clients came to mind. She was an executive at a huge firm and was responsible for making most of the decisions at her company. It was hard for her to relax during traditional massages so she decided to try Thai Massage since there is a lot more movement and she felt she could be more involved. I told her that though the massage is different from traditional Western massage her involvement needed to be very minimal for her to reap the benefits of the session. It took a little while but she finally relaxed and allowed herself to just be in that moment. Afterwards she told me that she just closed her eyes and envisioned she was a bird flying freely and that helped her to relax and let go.

Following my own advice, I closed my eyes and started to truly relax. I quieted my mind and thought of myself as a feather blowing gently in the wind. In that moment I allowed myself to be completely open and free. The rest of the session was a blur but I can tell you that I am still floating in the wind! There are several opportunities for us to be free - worry-free, carefree, stress-free. So I encourage you to take a moment, look out the window or close your eyes and choose to be free.

May this day, and your weekend, find you in a state of peace, happiness and joy.

Live, breath and accept abundance

I know a lot of us have been glued to the television set watching the crash of the stock market along with everything else we have invested our hard earned money into. Due to all the gloom and doom I decided to spend less time watching television and more time reading books. With my newfound downtime I re-discovered Napoleon Hill and Dr. Dennis Kimbro’s Think and Grow Rich, A Black Choice. I already listened to Napoleon Hill’s first book Think and Grow Rich on audiocassette and had NO idea that the “black” version would offer any greater insight… boy was I wrong. Black, white, yellow or purple, we need to read these books! It reminded me that we create our own reality, regardless of what is going on in the world around us. Yes, we are being told that stocks are crashing and the market is “down”, but lest we forget that we do have the power to control our destiny through faith and manifestation.

So I have resolved to turn off the television, ignore the papers and claim and manifest all the desires of my heart. Your life is what YOU make it… not what you are told. If you want to be wealthy in this time of need, claim it and believe it is coming sooner than later. I live by the rule ask, believe and receive. We can all live the life we dream of. We have to just believe that it is here and we are worthy.

This day I encourage you to live happily, abundantly and blissfully!

Music therapy...

Today I woke up in one of those moods. I was tempted to roll over and stay in bed all day, despite my long to do list. Knowing that sleeping in was not an option, especially on a Monday, I dragged myself out of the bed and put my iPod on shuffle. On my way to the bathroom I stumped my toe. I managed to slip getting out of the tub, almost breaking something. And to add icing on the cake I got floss stuck in my teeth. Just GREAT… going back to bed was starting to look more like an option. Then I heard it:

Birds flying high you know how I feel. Sun in the sky you know how I feel. Breeze drifting on by you know how I feel. It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me....and I'm feeling good.

The soulful sultry voice of Nina Simone filled the room. Her music lifted my dark cloud and gave me the inspiration I needed to continue on with my day – minus the bad mood. I began to sing with her and danced as I allowed her words to sink in.

It’s amazing how powerful a song can be. Have you ever been in a mood and a song comes on right on time and changes things? Music is a very powerful tool in shifting energy. The next time you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, or something happens to sour your beautiful day, listen to music for inspiration.

Have a blessed and peaceful day!

Ask, believe and receive

This morning I woke up a little before 5 am. My eyes just popped open and I began to smile. For four months I have been working on buying a new location for my yoga and wellness studio. The process started in April when I saw a quaint house right around the corner from where I lived with a for sale sign in the yard. It was definitely a fixer-upper but I saw the potential. While driving by with a friend she commented that I better buy that house to use as a studio.

I was amazed because I had looked longingly at the house several times in passing and thought the same thing but never told anyone. My friend voiced what I was feeling and I took this as validation. On a beautiful April afternoon my friend and I (who happens to share my first and maiden name and lives on the SAME street!) went by to see the owner. I fell in love with the land and the potential to do great things with the property. I told him that I was very interested and I would be back.... and I did come back with intention in hand. I wrote on a small piece of paper that the property is sold to me and I also wrote the amount I wanted to pay for it.

Time passed, the market changed and my first loan fell through. As I hurried to secure financing I refused to give up hope. I was turned down by 7 banks that could not see my vision. Determined to make my dream a reality I took a picture of the house and put it in my journal. Each day I would look at the picture and thought about all the wonderful things I was going to do with the property. Then as the Universe would have it I found someone who was willing to work with me - but I had to come up with 20% down! Not having the funds at the time to put down I went to work on manifesting the money and thought about my new space. The first closing date passed and a second was secured with a promise to put more down on good faith for the owner's assurance. Donations and support started pouring in from friends, family, clients and their associates. In the nick of time I had all that I needed!

Through asking, believing and receiving my blessing I have manifested the largest thing (so far) in my life. Anyone can do this! Just know and believe you are worthy and open yourself to love and abundance. It is important to stay in a state of excitement for whatever you want to manifest and don't let doubt creep in. You can manifest as quickly as you like, you just have to have blind faith - BELIEVE!